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I love how this post is like “Oh, clean up some of the nastiest, hard to clean shit with coke!” but doesn’t mention “Hey, you actually ingest this stuff that can clean CORRODED CAR BATTERIES.”
Heyyy this is because when you put carbon dioxide to make the carbonated water, you get carbonic acid. Carbonic acid varies in how much the pH is, especially in the different coke products. Strong enough to dissolve rust but not steel or any of the metals mentioned here.
But here’s the thing, carbonic acid is not one of the 6 strong acids. You know what is one of those? Hydrocholric acid. You know where you naturally secrete hydrocholric acid? Your stomach. Hydrochloric acid is some nasty stuff and WILL eat away at a screw if allowed to soak long enough. If you ever got just drop of a diluted solution on your skin in chem lab, then you can see where that would happen very easily.
The stronger acid wins. Your tummy is fine when you drink coke. Your tummy makes acid strong enough to fuck that corroded battery up. It can handle a can of coke. Please don’t swallow a screw or something to test this tho, please.
thank you science side of tumblr <3
Seriously. You could probably do all of these with lemon juice (citric acid) or vinegar (ethanoic, or acetic, acid) just because acids work in pretty similar ways. Actually, when you see people recommending vinegar as a household cleaner? This is what it’s doing!
Also, as someone who has accidentally inhaled hydrochloric acid fumes, TRUST ME, THE CARBONIC ACID IS MUCH BETTER.
Every time I see a hysterical post on modern food I just kinda point and laugh
Because dude. Dude. You know what you breathe in and out every fucking second to survive? Oxygen. An incredibly corrosive gas that is probably responsible for more deaths across the history of the planet than anything else. Not only that, it’s a biproduct of photosynthesis. You literally rely on plant excretions to survive
Do you know what most of your body is made up of? Water. Which, given enough time, will destroy anything.
That morning coffee you like? Well shit, caffeine - lifeblood to many - is actually an incredibly potent nerve toxin (If you’re an insect). Plants actually produce that shit as an insecticide.
That refreshing zing from citrus? Acid. That juicy smack of a tomato? Acid and cadmium. That tart in an apple? Arsenic. That seasoning you put all over your fish and chips? Acid strong enough to destroy seashells - life that has evolved to survive living in a salt-drenched sea.
Stop being a tit and drink your damned coke.
EVERYTHING. IS. CHEMICALS.
It IS safe to say though that drinking/eating too many acidic foods CAN damage some things such as the esophagus or teeth - but it does require QUITE a lot of acid.
We freed them…but at what cost?
that ball wasn’t there to trap them
it was to protect us
this is the best pun in tv history but oh my gosh the feels
a lake in montana whose water is so clear it appears shallow, when really its over 100 feet deep!
this is actually kinda terrifying because what if someone doesn’t know how deep it is, so they go diving and try to swim to the bottom, but they always seem just out of reach, so they just keep swimming… and when they realize something’s wrong it’s too late
Imagine seeing a body at the bottom….
tumblr has the ability to turn everything beautiful into something terrifying
What if you see a skeleton at the bottom of what appears to be a shallow part of the lake. As you dive down to check them out you notice the water is deeper than you originally thought. Much deeper. You come to realize that there is no way these remains could be human, you’re not even half-way down and already the skull already looks bigger than your car
This started so tranquil and then it turned into Friday the 13th
Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
You’re an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:
Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.
UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:
A fucking fork?
I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
I always need this on my blog.
I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning.